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Welcome!
This blog will bring you web page updates and observations on communication and conflict in daily life as well as other information and links to useful resources.
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Communication and Conflict in Schools
This page looks at common issues of communication and conflict in schools and the relevance of the Principles of Effective Communication and Underlying Philosophies of Mediation to these issues.
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Guide to the Principles
Sales page for The Guide to the Principles of Effective Communication and Conflict Resolution
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communication and conflict e-book
Communication and Conflict e-book about the Principles of Effective Communication and Conflict Resolution discussed on this site
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The Communication and Conflict website - further information about this site.
This page explains more about the Communication and Conflict website and the importance of effective communication skills for conflict resolution in relationships.
Defining Personality Types, Conflict Management Styles, Effective Communication Styles - For What Purpose?
This Newsletter article questions the purpose or relevance of defining 'conflict management styles' and 'communication styles' in supporting effective communication and conflict resolution. They lead to a focus on an individual's 'type' rather than their behaviour and such categorisations serve to disempower clients involved in difficulties rather than empower them. Being diagnosed or categorised as a particular 'type' by the conflict resolution 'expert' detracts from dealing with the behaviour and difficulty of concern. Instead, it seems to make the practitioner central to the situation rather than the difficulty itself as the client awaits their 'diagnosis'.
Newsletter and RSS flyer - articles on conflict resolution
Subscribe to the Communication and Conflict Newsletter with articles on conflict resolution and effective interpersonal communication
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Listening - the importance of effective listening in conflict resolution
This page describes in detail the practice and purpose and importance of effective listening in conflict resolution. Barriers to effective listening. It's not just down to eye contact and nodding!
Training in Mediation, Conflict Management , effective communication skills
This page offers mediation training, conflict management training and communication skills training based on the ideas and approaches discussed on this website.
Listening Exercise : Facts and Feelings
A listening exercise which enables participants to reflect on various aspects of the experience of listening and being listened to as well as the experience of being the speaker in a situation.
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Questioning
This page describes how questioning is used to support conflict resolution, instead of suggestions, to empower those involved to create a resolution that works for them.
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Communication and Conflict
A website about the relationship between communication and conflict. Articles on conflict resolution, interpersonal communication and relationships. Insights gained from the practice of Mediation.
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Free e-book, Contemplations on Communication and Conflict
A free e-book- Contemplations on Communication and Conflict -7 articles on conflict resolution/interpersonal communication articles from the Newsletter archive.
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Effective Interpersonal Communication
What is effective interpersonal communication? This page lists a set of links to Effective Interpersonal Communication articles drawn from the experiences of mediation.
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Why Interpreting Body Language, Tone of Voice etc. hinders communication
How interpreting body language and other non-verbal behaviour and treating communication as a 'science' leads to disconnection between people.
'Body Language' in Communication
Most of us will have heard the Mehrabian Myth. Some workshop presenters will quote 'scientific research' that 'proves' that 55% of our communication is 'body language', 38% is 'tone of voice' and only 7% is made up of the words we use. Sadly....sorry... Joyfully, this is a misrepresentation of the scientific study that the figures are claimed to be from. Professor Mehrabian, the man who carried out the study, says he 'cringes' whenever he hears the figures quoted.
This webpage describes many of the problems that arise when it is believed there is a 'science' to 'interpreting body language'.
As well as the article, there is a link to a recording of Professor Mehrabian discussing his study and an excellent video 'Busting the Mehrabian Myth' from Creativityworks.net .
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Assumptions we make about others. A training exercise to explore this.
This page describes a training exercise used to explore the assumptions we make about others when we meet them.
4-word-build, conflict resolution exercise
4-word-build - a conflict resolution exercise for gaining a shared understanding of a concept in a group or team. The exercise enables all present to participate in the creation of the shared view.
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Conflict Resolution Exercises and Effective Communication Exercises
Some of the most popular pages on my site are those that describe the exercises we use to train mediators where I work. This exercise is an excellent one for illustrating how differently we can each interpret just a single word, but it also offers the opportunity to create a shared understanding of an idea, a concept or project...or a word.
At the bottom of the page you will find links to other pages describing exercises we use.
Workplace Conflict Resolution and Communication
This page considers workplace conflict resolution via the use of the Principles of Effective (workplace) communication
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Build your own website
Build your own website - on this page, Alan explains how he was able to communicate his interests in the area of mediation, conflict resolution and communication skills by building his own website
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The impact of labels on communication and conflict resolution
This page considers the impact of labels and preconceptions on the effectiveness of communication and conflict resolution.
Other websites related to Communication and Conflict
This page gives links to websites that promote a similar approach to communication and conflict resolution to that described on this site.
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Conflict Resolution Skills e-booklet
This e-booklet brings together the conflict resolution skills of Listening, Summarising and Questioning described on the Communication and Conflict website. It can be purchased here for easy reference
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challenge the behaviour and not the person
That we challenge the behaviour and not the person, Principle 7 of the Principles of
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Ownership - an Underlying Philosophy of Mediation
This page discusses the concept of having 'ownership' of our responses to a conflict or difficulty, one of the most important pre-requisites of effective conflict resolution
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The no-blame approach and the alternative blame approach
This page considers some everyday examples of where the blame approach has occurred and why it is ineffective as a response to conflict, particularly when compared to the no-blame approach.
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no-blame approach
This pages discusses a no-blame approach to dealing with conflict, enabling a focus on how to improve things in the future rather than a focus on allocating blame to what has passed.
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Communication and Conflict Webinar Sign Up Page,
This is the Sign Up Page for a Communication and Conflict Webinar presented by Alan Sharland
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Telephone Consultation using Skype
This page provides details of the telephone consultation service provided on the Communication and Conflict website
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Conflict Coaching
This page describes Conflict Coaching, a process designed to support people on a 1 to 1 basis who are experiencing a difficulty or destructive conflict to create more effective ways of responding.
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Using I-statements
This is a link page from a Newsletter which reviews the use of 'I-statements' and the importance of these in effective communication and conflict resolution.
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Communication Mistakes as Opportunities for learning
This page looks at the different ways in which we can treat mistakes. Mistakes as opportunities, mistakes as something to be ignored, mistakes as something to condemn or be condemned by.
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mistakes
That it is ok to make mistakes. Principle 9 of the Principles of Effective Communication.
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The Video Lounge
This page draws together a range of videos available on the internet that illustrate practices of effective communication and conflict resolution.
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Rescuer Syndrome
The Rescuer Syndrome - the main obstacle to being able to provide effective conflict resolution support.
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Communication and Conflict in the Helping Professions
This page looks at common difficulties experienced by the helping professions and how their responses can actually sometimes escalate conflicts through professionals not being clear about their organi
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About the Author, Alan Sharland
Information about Alan Sharland, the author of the Communication and Conflict website
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Questions?
This page gives you the opportunity to ask questions about how to apply the Principles of Effective Communication in your life
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Your Comments
This page gives the comments that users of the site have made about it including questions they have posed and the answers given as well as ways in which they have found it to be useful.
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Conflict : an opportunity for learning, connection and insight
This page describes an approach to conflict that sees it as an opportunity for learning, connection and insight
