Communication and Conflict BLOG

Assumptions we make about others. A training exercise to explore this.

Wed, 30 Jun 2010 14:44:11 GMT

This page describes a conflict management training exercise used to explore the assumptions we make about others when we meet them.

Communication and Conflict

Sun, 20 Jun 2010 18:10:58 GMT

A website about the relationship between communication and conflict. Articles on conflict resolution, mediation, why effective communication is important for conflict management in relationships.

Effective interpersonal communication, conflict resolution articles

Sun, 20 Jun 2010 18:06:07 GMT

Communication and Conflict e-book about the Principles of Effective Communication and Conflict Resolution discussed on this site

no-blame approach

Sun, 20 Jun 2010 17:14:48 GMT

This pages discusses a no-blame approach to dealing with conflict, enabling a focus on how to improve things in the future rather than a focus on allocating blame to what has passed.

The no-blame approach and the alternative blame approach

Sun, 20 Jun 2010 17:12:24 GMT

This page considers some everyday examples of where the blame approach has occurred and why it is ineffective as a response to conflict, particularly when compared to the no-blame approach.

Guide to the Principles

Tue, 15 Jun 2010 00:36:54 GMT

Sales page for The Guide to the Principles of Effective Communication and Conflict Resolution

Mistakes, experiential learning, conflict resolution articles

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 22:43:00 GMT

That it is ok to make mistakes. Principle 9 of the Principles of Effective Interpersonal Communication.

confidentiality

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 22:35:42 GMT

Confidentiality is both an Underlying Philosophy of Mediation and a Principle of Effective Communication and is crucial in supporting effective conflict resolution.

Effective interpersonal communication, speak but not too often or for too long

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 22:27:34 GMT

That we speak, but not too often or for too long. Principle 6 of the Principles of Effective Interpersonal Communication

The Video Lounge

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 22:00:50 GMT

This page draws together a range of videos available on the internet that illustrate practices of effective communication and conflict resolution.

Effective Interpersonal Communication

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 21:34:57 GMT

What is effective interpersonal communication? This page lists a set of links to Effective Interpersonal Communication articles drawn from the experiences of mediation.

Other websites related to Communication and Conflict

Sun, 30 May 2010 13:11:56 GMT

This page gives links to websites that promote a similar approach to communication and conflict resolution to that described on this site.

What is a 'bully'?

Tue, 25 May 2010 20:55:14 GMT

A very common phrase used when there is a breakdown in a relationship or in communication is to say 'He/She's a bully!'. But what is a bully? Often there will be different interpretations of behaviour meaning some people see someone as a bully, others see them as 'passionate' or determined or assertive. But how others see someone we think of as a 'bully' doesn't, in itself, help much. What matters is how WE respond to the behaviour we see as signifying a bully. Do we withdraw and complain, do we reflect on why their actions upset us? Do we try to develop new ways of responding? Often the label itself is enough to paralyse the labeller into passivity. Supporting someone in this situation through helping them reflect on their response and how they can respond in ways that support them is the first step to getting rid of 'the bully'.

The impact of labels on communication and conflict resolution

Mon, 24 May 2010 01:03:15 GMT

This page considers the impact of labels and preconceptions on the effectiveness of communication and conflict resolution.

Impartiality

Sat, 22 May 2010 12:40:19 GMT

This page discusses impartiality, an essential Underlying Philosophy of Mediation and of

Articles on Conflict Resolution

Sat, 22 May 2010 12:34:34 GMT

Articles on Conflict Resolution.The underlying thinking and practical skills involved in effective conflict resolution.

Conflict as a Problem

Sat, 22 May 2010 10:34:49 GMT

This page looks at the approach to conflict which treats it as a problem, something to be feared or avoided. Ultimately, this approach is an ineffective response to conflict and does not resolve it.

Listening - the importance of effective listening in conflict resolution

Sat, 22 May 2010 00:36:54 GMT

This page describes in detail the practice and purpose and importance of effective listening in conflict resolution. Barriers to effective listening. It's not just down to eye contact and nodding!

Communication and Conflict in Schools

Sat, 22 May 2010 00:21:15 GMT

This page looks at common issues of communication and conflict in schools and the relevance of the Principles of Effective Communication and Underlying Philosophies of Mediation to these issues.

Conflict : an opportunity for learning, connection and insight

Fri, 21 May 2010 23:56:42 GMT

This page describes an approach to conflict that sees it as an opportunity for learning, connection and insight

Empowerment

Fri, 21 May 2010 22:51:56 GMT

This describes why empowerment is a crucial aim in any approach to effective conflict resolution

Squirrel Inc

Fri, 21 May 2010 13:22:48 GMT

Squirrel Inc.: A Fable of Leadership Through Storytelling I think the benefits of storytelling as a communication technique are really under-rated. This

Sweat Your Prayers
by
Gabrielle Roth

Fri, 21 May 2010 13:14:09 GMT

Sweat Your Prayers: Movement as Spiritual Practice Is a way to communicate and overcome many different conflicts within each of us ~ through movement

Mediation - it's not arbitration!

Mon, 17 May 2010 01:40:57 GMT

There is a fundamental difference between mediation and arbitration, but unfortunately the distinction is not always clearly understood.

Build your own website

Sat, 15 May 2010 22:28:29 GMT

Build your own website - on this page, Alan explains how he was able to communicate his interests in the area of mediation, conflict resolution and communication skills by building his own website

challenge the behaviour and not the person

Tue, 11 May 2010 00:26:11 GMT

That we challenge the behaviour and not the person, The importance of effective communication skills.

Conflict as Competition

Tue, 11 May 2010 00:18:25 GMT

This page looks at the concept of conflict as a competition. This is probably the most destructive approach to conflict and is the basis of the 'justification' for most physical violence and war.

Ownership - an Underlying Philosophy of Mediation

Tue, 11 May 2010 00:01:05 GMT

This page discusses the concept of having 'ownership' of our responses to a conflict or difficulty, one of the most important pre-requisites of effective conflict resolution

Listening Exercise : Facts and Feelings

Wed, 05 May 2010 16:31:20 GMT

A listening exercise which enables participants to reflect on various aspects of the experience of listening and being listened to as well as the experience of being the speaker in a situation.

An Adult-Adult relationship between the mediator and client is important.

Wed, 05 May 2010 16:15:49 GMT

This page looks at the need for an Adult-Adult relationship between a mediator or other conflict resolution supporter if it is to be effective.

Questioning skills

Wed, 05 May 2010 16:09:15 GMT

This page describes the use of effective questioning skills to support conflict resolution, instead of suggestions, to empower those involved to create a resolution that works for them.

summarising

Wed, 05 May 2010 16:04:06 GMT

This page describes the practice and purpose of summarising in effective interpersonal communication and conflict resolution.

Workplace Conflict Resolution and Communication

Wed, 05 May 2010 15:59:06 GMT

This page considers workplace conflict resolution via the use of the Principles of Effective (workplace) communication

Conflict

Tue, 13 Apr 2010 21:57:47 GMT

This page looks at 3 main ways of seeing or approaching conflict and how each one has different implications for the outcome.

The Tao of Tango

Wed, 07 Apr 2010 10:41:00 GMT

The Tao of Tango Tango needs clear mind for communication and I find this book rebases me on and off the dance floor when I need to communicate and avoid

The Communication and Conflict website - further information about this site.

Sun, 04 Apr 2010 12:29:15 GMT

This page explains more about the Communication and Conflict website and the importance of effective communication skills for conflict resolution in relationships.

Treat each other with respect

Sat, 27 Mar 2010 16:53:28 GMT

That we treat each other with respect, Principle 1 of the Principles of Effective

Communication skills and Conflict resolution skills

Sat, 27 Mar 2010 11:38:12 GMT

This page looks at the skills involved in practicing both effective communication and effective conflict resolution

Using I-statements

Fri, 26 Mar 2010 23:38:33 GMT

This is a link page from a Newsletter which reviews the use of 'I-statements' and the importance of these in effective communication and conflict resolution.

Book Reviews

Fri, 26 Mar 2010 22:47:07 GMT

This page contains a list of book reviews, all of which relate to supporting effective interpersonal communication and conflict resolution

Prejudice, Stereotypes, Assumptions, Labels - and Conflict Resolution

Thu, 25 Mar 2010 20:44:29 GMT

Assumptions, stereotypes and labels are unavoidable in our use of language. But recognising that any label can only be an assumption or stereotype, can make the difference between prejudice and awareness that our labels are just conventions we use to avoid describing each person, thing or experience in the minutest detail. When we understand this, we more readily reject prejudice, discrimination and negativity toward a category of people based on a label used to describe them. We see that the label is not the thing itself and can never truly represent it. Thus any assumptions we hold based on labels such as 'black', 'white', 'man', 'woman', 'Muslim', 'American' etc. are always wrong and to resolve any conflict we associate with those who fall into such categories we have to question our own assumptions about them.

Why Interpreting Body Language, Tone of Voice etc. hinders communication

Sun, 21 Mar 2010 16:46:02 GMT

How interpreting body language and other non-verbal behaviour and treating communication as a 'science' leads to disconnection between people.

Walk Innovation - a Communication and Conflict featured website

Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:11:49 GMT

This page describes Walk Innovation, an approach to achieving wealth, health and happiness through the medium of walking and talking

The Use of Effective Questioning Skills to Support Conflict Resolution

Thu, 18 Mar 2010 22:15:53 GMT

Effective Questioning Skills rather than advice and suggestions are the most effective way of supporting the resolution of conflict as they empower those involved rather than try to solve their problem for them. This article discusses the thinking behind this approach as used in the practice of mediation. "This article is the BEST article on questioning I have ever read and I'd like, with your permission, to pass it along to our mediators.Your examples of both genuinely open and 'not-so-open' with explanations are very insightful." ML - Canadian Govt. Agency

Improving Listening Skills

Tue, 16 Mar 2010 22:01:35 GMT

Exploring the importance of effective listening, this page describes a listening skills activity used to train mediators in this aspect of effective communication and conflict resolution.

A recommended book on this theme is Rebecca Shafir's - The Zen of Listening - Mindful Communication in the Age of Distraction:

Define Mediation - well it's definitely not Arbitration!

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 22:38:35 GMT

Unfortunately the descriptions that are given as an attempt to define mediation, and many of the practices that take its name are more akin to arbitration - a fundamentally different process to that which is described as mediation on this website.

What is Mediation?

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 22:32:46 GMT

This page looks at the approach to mediation taken by the website author and by his colleagues at the mediation service where he works.

Active Listening Activities - Summarising

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 22:17:37 GMT

Summarising is one of the most powerful and important aspects of effective listening. However it is rarely used, and even when it is, it's full potential isn't realised if the summary does not focus on using the words of the speaker to give a clear indication that they have been listened to rather than 'reframed' into the view of the 'listener'. For anyone wondering how to improve interpersonal communication, a conscious commitment to the use of summaries that stay true to the words used by the speaker will be an excellent start and the benefits will be experienced immediately. Try it and see.

Defining Personality Types, Conflict Management Styles, Effective Communication Styles - For What Purpose?

Sun, 07 Mar 2010 00:05:02 GMT

This Newsletter article questions the purpose or relevance of defining 'conflict management styles' and 'communication styles' in supporting effective communication and conflict resolution. They lead to a focus on an individual's 'type' rather than their behaviour and such categorisations serve to disempower clients involved in difficulties rather than empower them. Being diagnosed or categorised as a particular 'type' by the conflict resolution 'expert' detracts from dealing with the behaviour and difficulty of concern. Instead, it seems to make the practitioner central to the situation rather than the difficulty itself as the client awaits their 'diagnosis'.

Newsletter and RSS flyer - articles on conflict resolution

Sat, 06 Mar 2010 23:38:15 GMT

Subscribe to the Communication and Conflict Newsletter with articles on conflict resolution and effective interpersonal communication