CAOS Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution

A Guide to Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution introduces the 9 Principles that are also described on this site to help the reader develop a 'mindfulness' in relation to their communication in a way that supports the resolution of conflict. In this book 

Alan shares his observations and learnings from working as a Mediator and Conflict Coach with regard to the ways that people become stuck in unresolved conflict but also how they go on to create more effective ways forward in their difficult situations. 

"I think you put together so well all the essential components of
conflict transformation in a way which people can relate to and
understand. A brilliant book and I will recommend it to everyone."  

Jo Berry  -

Italians are Assumed to be Lazy , Criminal and oversexed

by Sarah

Moving to the ultra conservative southeast US was a very upsetting experience. All kinds of horrible assumptions were made about me to the point of putting me in danger .I had no idea how bad it could get .
Assumptions that I was dangerous, criminal , violent , over sexed .It was like living in a weird carnival , with distorted mirrors everywhere.
Extreme bias and hatred was covered with sugary sweet pleasantries until they tried to entrap me .
Because it was 'faith based' oragnisations were involved , this shattered my faith . I am a Northerner, Non Baptist , and an Italian woman so I was subjected to extremely humiliating and cruel treatment .

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Dec 22, 2015
by: Alan

Thanks Sarah. Yes, as you and the article point out, assumptions can be made on the basis of labels we attach to people which then mean we don't try to get to know them because we assume we 'already know' what someone who fits our label will be like.

This happens in most of our daily interactions and we rarely question it in ourselves, although it is much more easily seen when we experience it from others.

Thanks again for your comment.


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Are you UK-based and  looking for mediation, conflict coaching or training in communication and/or conflict resolution related issues?

If so, please contact Alan via his organisation website at CAOS Conflict Management