Contact, Questions & Comments
Can't quite find what you are looking for but you think it might be in here somewhere?
Do you have a question for Alan?
Are you struggling with a particular communication or conflict resolution issue and you think this site may help?
Or would you like to make a comment about the site?
Then this is the page for you!
There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to. Joseph Heller, Catch-22
Please use the form below if:
- There are aspects of the information and concepts presented on this website that puzzle you, or interest you, and you would like to know more about them.
- You would like to ask about ways of applying the information and concepts in your own life.
- You can't quite find what you are looking for but you think it is in there somewhere. (Although a visit to the Sitemap may help you with this)
- You have comments about the website and what it has to say.
- You want to contact me, Alan Sharland, the author/creator of the Communication and Conflict website .
If you are interested in courses based on the approach described on this site you may wish to visit the Training page first, but you can contact me from either this page or that one to ask about training.
If you'd like to see some of the comments made by visitors to the site Click Here
Thank you for your interest.
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Join our new
ONLINE Introduction to Conflict Coaching Skills
(6 x 2 hour sessions on Zoom)
Learn about the CAOS Model of Conflict Coaching, the first to be developed in the UK in 2008 and one that does not have to be connected to ongoing mediation but can be simply a 'stand alone' support service for individuals.
Open to non-UK attendees - visit the link above for more details and to register your interest.
Train to be a Mediator in London, UK with CAOS Conflict Management.
A Guide to Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution introduces the 9 Principles that are also described on this site to help the reader develop a 'mindfulness' in relation to their communication in a way that supports the resolution of conflict. In this book
Alan shares his observations and learnings from working as a Mediator and Conflict Coach with regard to the ways that people become stuck in unresolved conflict but also how they go on to create more effective ways forward in their difficult situations.
"I think you put together so well all the essential components of
conflict transformation in a way which people can relate to and
understand. A brilliant book and I will recommend it to everyone." Jo Berry www.buildingbridgesforpeace.org
Some more comments about this site.....
Hi Alan
It is refreshing to find reading material that informs and inspires and can provide a good resource for small organisations such as ours.
Anne Johnston - The Shropshire Housing Alliance Mediation Service
I did a 1 hour workshop where I presented your Facts and Feelings Listening Exercise. We learned so much about how we listen and the consequences of not listening well that I was asked to purchase your book and have another Listening Meeting.
My team just launched a project that could have whipped the team members and executives into a tremendous conflict. I required everyone to follow your rules for listening and it has been the best implementation we have had in 10years.
Thank you for your generous and comprehensive communications and conflict resolution information.
Angela - Information Technology & Systems VP
'What is a Bully?' Comment on article by Alan which was published on the Mediate.com website
Thank you SO MUCH for this article! It brings forward some very key points about the phenomenon of "bullying" which I have been pondering for some while. Among others, asking to what extent can/should the person on the receiving end of the bullying/perceived to be bullying take responsibility/initiate steps to shift the paradigm? How can this happen without implying that the recipient is somehow responsible for the bullying behavior?
To a certain extent the steps you suggest point to the strategies of NonViolent Communication: Observe and simply describe the behavior, understand and honor your own feelings and needs in the situation, and take responsibility for meeting them by making requests to change the situation.
There has been a significant upsurge of email traffic about bullying in the last year among the members of the Int'l. Ombudsman's Association (principally the academic sector). Much of the exchange, in my view, has tended to favor the stance of "recipient of the behavior as victim," without agency to change the situation, thereby perpetuating the problem and doing a disservice to all. I will be forwarding this article to my colleagues to spice up the conversation!
Laurie McCann, Campus Ombuds, Univ Calif Santa Cruz
Comments
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