CAOS Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution

A Guide to Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution introduces the 9 Principles that are also described on this site to help the reader develop a 'mindfulness' in relation to their communication in a way that supports the resolution of conflict. In this book 

Alan shares his observations and learnings from working as a Mediator and Conflict Coach with regard to the ways that people become stuck in unresolved conflict but also how they go on to create more effective ways forward in their difficult situations. 

"I think you put together so well all the essential components of
conflict transformation in a way which people can relate to and
understand. A brilliant book and I will recommend it to everyone."  

Jo Berry  - BuildingBridgesForPeace.org


What if...

by Matt
(EC WI)

I can use I statements as part of my daily vocabulary, but if the other person't does not, it will be very awkward for them to hear. This will cause them to laugh, call names, hit etc. (especially if they two are middle school kids.!

How do you handle these situations.

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Feb 13, 2017
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What if....
by: Alan

Hi Matt

Thanks for your comment and question.

I think I-statements are only awkward if they are the 'scripted' kind that you can find described in some books. Generally they can be stated pretty naturally as part of normal speech and when their greater accuracy as a statement is considered it actually makes more sense to use them than to not use them.

However, if you can think of examples to share that you do think are awkward to hear we could look a bit more at that, but in general I'd say, if you simply start to practise saying them as a normal part of speech they are less likely to feel awkward.

Alan

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Are you UK-based and  looking for mediation, conflict coaching or training in communication and/or conflict resolution related issues?

If so, please contact Alan via his organisation website at CAOS Conflict Management