A Guide to Effective Communication for Conflict Resolution introduces the 9 Principles that are also described on this site to help the reader develop a 'mindfulness' in relation to their communication in a way that supports the resolution of conflict. In this book
Alan shares his observations and learnings from working as a Mediator and Conflict Coach with regard to the ways that people become stuck in unresolved conflict but also how they go on to create more effective ways forward in their difficult situations.
"I think you put together so well all the essential components of
conflict transformation in a way which people can relate to and
understand. A brilliant book and I will recommend it to everyone."
Jo Berry - BuildingBridgesForPeace.org
The 'traditional' approach to workplace bullying allegations is to use an adversarial, investigative process to try to 'prove' that bullying has occurred.
And yet it is extremely rare that such an approach leads to an effective outcome for anyone involved, to the extent that many people resign themselves to the 'inevitable' destructive outcomes of such allegations:
So WHY are these outcomes not 'inevitable' and WHAT IS a more constructive approach?
Stepping out of the Circle of Blame to Create an Effective Outcome for All!
"Alan Sharland has written a vital book on bullying. His approach is the way forward. Instead of focusing on 'proving it', which takes us in the direction of investigations and hearings that go no where and only serve to exacerbate an already sensitive situation, he shows the way forward through direct communication and a focus on the behavior that is of concern." John Ford - HR Mediation Academy
This isn't a 'theory based' book.
It draws upon direct experiences of situations where workplace bullying has been alleged and then resolved effectively through an approach which is always directed towards successfully improving and rebuilding working relationships.
Buy the Book!
How to Resolve Bullying in the Workplace can assist you if you:
Workplace bullying allegations do not have to mean team-breakdown, loss of staff, employment tribunals and long, arduous, ineffective grievance procedures.
Of course it is a difficult time when such allegations are made but the focus does not have to be on 'damage limitation' - it can be a genuine opportunity for learning, change and renewed and improved working relationships within your organisation, and consequently, improved productivity, enhanced employee morale, satisfaction and engagement.
How to Resolve Bullying in the Workplace - Stepping Out of the Circle of Blame to Create an Effective Outcome for All describes an approach to workplace bullying allegations that enables a constructive way forward, opening the door to:
Click the image below and Buy the Book on Amazon - Paperback or Kindle!
If you are based in the UK and would like training or consultancy to help you deal with allegations of workplace bullying in a way that supports the creation of more effective working relationships please contact Alan Sharland on 020 3371 7507.
Please also call this number if you want mediation for your staff or conflict coaching for yourself.
Alternatively please use the CAOS Conflict Management Contact Page to make your enquiry.
If you are based outside of the UK and would like Conflict Coaching or other support via Skype, please also use the CAOS contact page to make your enquiry or request.
Is It Bullying?
I'm Alan Sharland, creator the Communication and Conflict website and author of the book referred to on this webpage.
I have written various other articles on the topic of bullying and the ways in which it is commonly responded to which do not work in a way that enables people to feel satisfied that the situation has been resolved.
(See this linkedin article as an example of the common approach that does not work)
There has been a vast 'industry' grown up around the issue of bullying in the workplace over the last 10-15 years but often it seems to want to encourage doing 'more of the same', not recognising, it seems, the ineffectiveness of the standard approach to allegations of bullying.
This book recounts my experiences as a mediator and conflict coach where people have, themselves, resolved their difficult workplace relationships, where bullying has been alleged.
Through the opportunity to reflect on the difficulties experienced and the opportunity to create more acceptable, constructive ways forward, people involved from 'all sides' of the workplace bullying allegation have been able to create a vastly improved working relationship from the 'debris' of the broken relationship that previously existed.
(Here's another article that discusses a more effective way of responding to allegations of bullying at work)
The difficulty of 'proving' bullying has occurred becomes a distraction from moving towards the creation of a better working relationship and the opportunity to acknowledge the impact of the respective behaviours of the person alleged to be the bully and the person alleging bullying has occurred.
Here's another article entitled 'What is a Bully?' that may be of interest to you.
Thank you for your interest in this topic and I hope you find the book interesting and useful if you go ahead and purchase it. You may find some image links that do not have the 'Circle of Blame' cover on it as this was a later version of the book. All versions now being sold will have this cover on it.
Please feel free to contact me at CAOS Conflict Management (opens a new page on a different website) if you have any questions or place a comment in the comments box at the bottom of this webpage.
Are you UK-based and looking for mediation, conflict coaching or training in communication and/or conflict resolution related issues?
If so, please contact Alan via his organisation website at CAOS Conflict Management
Apr 20, 19 04:32 AM
A listening exercise which enables participants to reflect on the experience of listening and being listened to and what this tells us about effective listening.
Apr 18, 19 08:17 AM
This page describes a training exercise used to explore the assumptions we make about others when we meet them and how this affects communication and conflict.
Apr 13, 19 03:54 AM
This was awesome! A great supplement to what I already teach. I can't wait to post it on my website! You are doing a great service. Thank you! Thank You!
Apr 07, 19 10:01 AM
This page gives links to websites that promote a similar approach to communication and conflict resolution to that described on this site.
Feb 22, 19 07:24 AM
That we speak for ourselves using I-statements, Principle 5 of the Principles of Effective Communication